STONED HISTORY: THE MOTHER OF ALL SAUCES, HOLLANDAISE
Originally published at Dope Magazine

It’s been said that chutney and soy sauce were the first condiments to be invented.
However, it was a French writer, doctor and prankster visiting Amsterdam — while as high as the Gods — who created the mother of all sauces: hollandaise.
François Rabelais studied theology, and by 1521 had become a priest. This was during the French Renaissance, and people were picking either religion or reason. Rabelais found himself torn between two beliefs. His desire to pursue medicine took over, and he ended up leaving his Benedictine monastery and considered himself a secular religious person from that point on.
Still driven by a desire to create and heal, Rabelais took a trip to Amsterdam, known for its famous festivals, to clear his head.
It was there that Rabelais made history, one that very few people are aware of. Being a man of faith as well as a man of reason, he had many unlikely friends. One of whom was Babur, born Zahīr ud-Dīn Muhammad, who not only became the emperor and founder of the Mughal dynasty but also introduced Rabelais to the wonders of smoking and eating hashish.
Feeling the effects of a festival bender in Amsterdam, Rabelais found himself in a pub kitchen making breakfast for those still standing.
Being the prankster that he was, he created a tangy sauce that would wake up the nearly-dead partiers and pucker their taste buds with inspiration.
He poured the sauce over eggs, bread and anything he could find. He also added a little of his own medicine: hashish. He later called the sauce “Dutch sauce” in honor of the place where he created it.
Many have debated the origin of hollandaise sauce and eggs Benedict;
I am here to reassure you that it was created by a precocious prankster, a Benedictine monk with both a passion for medicine and cannabis as well as a desire to inspire the living.
How to Make Dutch Sauce
INGREDIENTS
4 Egg yolks
1 tbsp. Lemon juice
½ cup Infused butter
1 pinch White pepper
1 pinch Cayenne Salt To taste
Water Or vinegar to thin sauce if needed
INSTRUCTIONS
Whisk briskly over medium heat until sauce thickens, then pour, serve and enjoy the festivities!
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